5 years ago there was a report in the Bangkok Post with the authorities revealing a high-speed rail link from Bangkok to Pattaya would be running by 2018, with fancy trains zooming along at 250kph. We were notified the train would blend you to the beach resort in under one hour. Honestly, the idea of speeding towards Pattaya at such excellent speed was a bit too frightening for the majority of people. Pattaya is the sort of location you require to reduce into carefully, preparing yourself for the psychological obstacle that waits for.
However there were 3 words in the report that provided a truth check. The task would go on “disallowing any issues”. And there was the rub. Those 3 innocent words can indicate a lot in Thailand.
Quick forward to recently and the inaugural journey of an unique weekend traveler train service from Bangkok to Pattaya. It’s not rather the “bullet train” that the report imagined 5 years back, however the two-and-a half hour journey was appropriate thinking about the existing routine day-to-day train typically uses up to 4 hours and can offer you a severe case of the “Numb Bottom Syndrome”.
The brand-new train is air conditioned and definitely looks a lot smarter and cleaner than the routine ancient rolling stock, and at 170 baht it is not too pricey. However one issue is what takes place to all these delighted travelers after alighting at Pattaya station which is some range from the town, leaving them at the grace of all those wonderful baht bus chauffeurs. That’s something I believe the VIPs on the inaugural train did not experience.
I want to recommend that this brand-new service be called “The Pattaya Thunderbolt”, for factors I will now describe …
The Lion of Titfield
I have actually constantly taken pleasure in riding trains, especially with steam engines. It might well have actually been the impact of among the very first movies my moms and dads took me to see, The Titfield Thunderbolt, starring Stanley Holloway and launched in 1953. It is a timeless British funny including a group of villagers attempting to conserve their branch line from the axe.
The genuine star of the program is a beautiful antique tank engine, which to name a few things needs to conquer a nasty steamroller which is utilized by the bad guys to obstruct the line. The engine utilized in the movie, Lion, was integrated in 1838 and was 114 years of ages at the time of recording. The movie is excellent enjoyable and still very watchable.
One marvels if the train authorities in Thailand would not be much better off having a “Pattaya Thunderbolt” utilizing a steam engine. It may even end up being a traveler destination in itself. Who could withstand a journey to the beachfront on a train with a name like that? And since it may be a bit on the sluggish side, it would prepare guests well for the thrills of Pattaya.
Ideally, it would not deal with any steamroller obstructing the line, although in Thailand you can never ever make certain.
Last train to London
A minimum of you do not get preached to on Thai trains. On a see to England, the partner and I took a train from Axminster in Devon to Waterloo. It was a really smooth trip, if pricey. The only disadvantage of the journey was a female who stood in the main aisle soon after we started and continued to offer a prolonged “Salaries of Sin” speech, anticipating completion of the world with lots of referrals to heathens, Satan and whatnot.
In a case in point of British reserve, all the guests just pretended she wasn’t there and rather buried their heads in their paper crossword or mobile phone. It felt a bit like a Monty Python sketch and I half anticipated to see John Cleese put in a look and begin doing a ridiculous walk or attempt to offer a dead parrot.
I was a bit worried what my Thai partner would make from this British eccentricity, however I need not have actually stressed. She was blissfully asleep the whole journey.
The age of steam
Something I have actually discovered on current journeys in Thailand is that the roadway indications for trains crossings still portray a rather charming steam train downing along, smoke burping out of the chimney. It’s rather heartening that the old choo-choo trains have not completely been forgotten. When I was initially here, magnificent steam engines were still pulling the reveals and the engineers frequently provided a great polish.
The State Trains of Thailand must not get too dispirited by criticism– it takes place worldwide. When British Rail was attempting to increase its image in the 1980s it developed a marketing campaign with posters declaring “This Is The Age Of The Train”. The taking a trip public, nevertheless, were not persuaded. On one poster an unhappy traveler had actually scrawled “Ours was 104”.
All aboard ‘The Pattaya Thunderbolt’.
A preferred news product from England worries a ticket collector at Dover station who remained in the practice of stating “Goodnight Jim” to a routine commuter on a night train. After 4 years of exchanging pleasantries, one night the traveler all of a sudden went crazy, taking a swing at the ticket collector, knocking him unconscious and putting him out of work for a fortnight.
In court a couple of weeks later on, when asked to describe this unforeseen outburst of violence, the traveler blurted out, “My name is Bert, not Jim!”
Contact Postscript by means of e-mail at oldcrutch@gmail.com
